Something I kind of just realized is that I am very mean to myself. Most of the time. And it is not good. If I'm depressed, instead of doing something to make myself happier, I wallow while simultaneously yelling at myself: "DON'T YOU DARE GO CRAZY AGAIN! OR ELSE!!" I won't even go into how much I've beaten myself up since age nine because of my OCD. If I am uninspired, I mentally abuse myself for it, calling myself lazy and talentless and unmotivated. Even if I do something small like losing my keys, for example, I yell at myself inside for being careless.
I would never be that unkind to other people, so why should I think it's okay to be mean to myself? Really, in regards to how I treat myself, my mind is a really negative place. And all along I thought it was just the way things were, that I was just born with faulty wiring or something and had to deal with it.
Hm. Not quite sure what to do about this though.
1 comment:
I was a vegetarian for a month. That was a hard month. You've been a vegetarian for years!
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