Dear July you never told me that I would be so
lonely
on your warmly sunshine days
& that the sunlight patterns would swirl
under my feet while I walked, but only
make me feel dizzy.
That Past-regrets & Worn-out Sorrows
would eat so many of my thoughts -
And of course, Worry about the Future,
and my state of being - what
boyfriendless? & invitationless
The weight of not leaving
But after all I have come so far
since January,
patching up the holes and cigarette burns,
nursing bad memories, then Quarantine.
I got a shock of life in
April,
halfasleep in lemonyellow light &
his kisses that tasted like beer&saltwater-
I have after all come so far since
April,
trudging trailing summerlight after me
disappointment stuck to my heart
wet grass stuck to my feet
Time
to announce
that I love you, day
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